2000年06月28日
Under the burden of Chinese Tradition, people think it is an embarrassment to express their affections, even to their beloved. Good Men are tailored to be cool, kept their passion in a low profile, etc.
It was a rainy day. The rain poured down like shower and I was wet from head to toe. As usual, I went home by bus after work. I rushed to the bus-stop like a car in full throttle and crowded through the gate in the bus - It was filled fully with passengers and I could hardly move like canned food.
At length, I found an inch to stand, next to a little boy, who was accompanied with his mother. Although the bus was crowded with passengers, I began to feel cold as I got wet thoroughly. After a whole day of hardship, I was so tired that I could fall into sleep even standing.
My eyelids were so heavy like steel bars that my eyes were forced to close. My strength began to go. I was just like a wounded soldier, sitting on a pool of blood and waiting for his end. I slept like a dead guy.
"Mum, I love you!" The boy, standing next to me, whispered like a noisy mosquito. I was just able to hear as I was awaken. His mother pretended to be unnoticed, but an expression of joy was written on her face. I knew it.
I felt odd for the behaviour of that child; my mind was flooded with questions: "How can he behave in this way? Does he feel embarrassed?" My mind told me that it was usual for a little, unsophisticated boy to express his passion in front of the crowd, because he was too naive to be shy.
Suddenly, "Mum, I love you!", the boy shouted loudly, embraced his mother tightly like a tightened rope and I was sure that all the passengers in the bus were able to hear such loud and clear message.
"Quiet!" Mum scolded softly, again, an expression of joy was filled on her face, which heated the air around us. The little crowded bus was submerged with an atmosphere of harmony, smile was hung on everyone's face. My blood was boiling, my heart was beating faster and faster like a horse in full gallop.
I pretended to be clam and got off the bus wordlessly. My mind was shocked like ocean in typhoon. "Dare I express my love to my mom, or my beloved lady?" I asked myself continuously.
After this incidence, I found an opportunity to share the passion in my innermost heart with my mother. She shed, but I was sure that those tears were symbols of happiness and satisfaction.
Next, I presented my love to my beloved lady.
As I expected, she rejected my affection. However, I was pound of what I had done. I just followed the instinct of man.
Love is not only an action but also a communication mean with others. Just keeping your passion in the deepest part of your heart is not a perfect love. Through the words, through the dialogue, communication gap can be bridged and the wheel of relation can be smoothened. I do want to express my delight to the little boy; this ordinary boy gives me the most extraordinary lesson in my life.
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