The Way To A Life With Confidence And Happiness

According to a telephone survey conducted by the Hong Kong Federation of Youth Group Research Center in 2000, nearly 10%of teenagers aged between 15–39 thinks that they are useless in the society. Up to 20% of the interviewed are pessimistic about their future. These thoughts are often brought by problems that came from school life, family life, and relationship problems. Continual dissatisfaction in life does not only bring unhappiness, but also lowers the self-esteem and confidence in oneself. This is where ethical tragedies and suicides start. To prevent these from happening, it is really a must to maintain teenagers in a happy and confident state.

But what are these things anyway? Happiness? Confidence? We hear them a lot, but they are really of nihility; you can't feel or touch them, although they have always been there. Russell, an English philosopher, said that there are 3 things that can make a person happy: A good bankbook, a good cook at home, and a good appetite. Apparently, he is really too brief and materialistic. Even if everything in the world is brought to you, if your soul is not satisfied, you may still be unhappy. Happiness is an emotional experience that we have named after receiving certain stimulation in the mind giving us pleasure, just like being angry or being nervous. When we "feel" that it should be "happy", then we become happy. Consequentially, we can see that it is the cognition step that went wrong – people feel unhappy because of certain issues. Similarly and in turn, people lose confidence too, and thus getting on to the wrong track.

Ok, even if something is really disappointing, instead of making a big fuss about how down your emotions are, why not trey to think the other way? The following are a number of issues that teenagers often get tangled up into, but they are also some of the most important ingredients for achieving a happy and confident life.

1. A sense of security

This is something which a teenager has little control of. This is provided by parents who offer food, shelter, and love in a family relationship. For teenagers, they always like to reach out and try new experiences, as well as to be free to make choices and take risks according to their won will. Security is soothing of a big obstacle when we have desires for freedom and independence, and often we feel bad when our parents come out to stop us, telling us how much they love us and things like that. But on the other hand, people in love willingly give up freedom for security in relationships. Homeless people gladly give up their freedom for security. Security is something we've always been asking for, but also running away from. Try to notice the intention of parents. Try to think: Teenagers in movies always go back to their security, when they're tired of life or when in trouble, that is, their parents. The desire for freedom becomes less important as a person matures, and security becomes more within control. We notice what security really is, and instead of always running away, we'll be happy to know that what we've been always looking for was so near to us.

2. Acceptance

Acceptance of those things which we have little or no control of. This means liking oneself, being proud of one's heritage, and making the best of the gifts which you were endorsed on the day you were born. Be satisfied with what you have got. Most people must have heard the saying "Things don't always come as wish". It is no use to lust over something you couldn't control. This way still work if you were an infant, but as you grow older, this will only bring more concrete results, along with upsets caused on to the person being pressured. Try to think what positive factors we can make out of an issue, instead of thinking what negative drawbacks it may bring. It may be annoying to see if storming, but at least you get the chance to try out your new raincoat right?
Another aspect that needs acceptance is for those who are difficult. Often they look down upon themselves and they fear how others look at them. But what difference does it make to be unhappy like this? Only you can help yourself to improve your own situation. Stand up to your fate; look for what may be an advantage to you, instead of hiding and being afraid of what others may do when they find out. Be wise to notice what difference you may bring. The world will be a lot brighter if we can think this way.

3. Friendship

This is the simplest part of achieving happiness. Try to get along well with everything that comes across your life, no matter they are your teachers, parents, brothers, sisters. Happiness will be shared among those who want to be happy.

4. Achievement

Carefully establish goals to achieve. Your happiness does not only come from the success and rewards, but also from the consistently applied effort of yours. Life becomes exciting as more goals are to be achieved and you seldom go bored. Of course, set goals that are practical and attainable. You will, find it frustrating when you meet failure, but don't give up – as you'll find confidence as you know more about yourself. If you've never tasted the bitterness to fail, how will you know the sweetness of being able to succeed?

5. Consideration for others

You may be happy on your own, but it does feels weird to have to think for others right? Well no one is perfect you know – not even yourself. Therefore, to be able to blend into a society, people have to be considerate to one another. Now you can't expect others to be considerate to you while you are not being considerate to them right? According to various studies, when we work or do something for somebody else, it is the most powerful stimuli to one's health, happiness and longevity. Conversely, ignoring, or being inconsiderate of others' rights, will lead to conflicts, which in turn brings unhappiness. When you think for others, you won't need to wait for their return to make you happy; you'll already be filled with joy when you se them being happy for what you have done for them.

The above are just the basics of leading to a life of happiness and confidence. A lot of other elements are required too, such as maintaining a healthy body to attain what was stated. You’ll be able to spot them when all the basics have been practiced. This path may be full of obstacles, but remember – don't give up, just try for it. To err is no disgrace; the disgrace only lies in not learning from the mistakes, not picking ourselves up, dusting ourselves off, and trying again.

May all who read this article live their lives with happiness and confident.